Almost everyone says they have ADD or ADHD these days. I do have real ADHD. For a long time, I had been seeking solution for that, even before I knew I had it (I did struggled with the symptoms, which I didn’t recognize as symptoms of the ADHD). But I do understand almost all of us need more focus, and reduce procrastination.
I have found the NOFAP movement online. It means no “fapping”, which means masturbation. Many testified that they have much less procrastination, more focus, better relationship, and a ripple effect of improvement in general.
As a Christian for many years, I did intend to practice abstinence, but due the lack of scientific understanding of how our brain work, I have failed repeatedly.
The participants of the movement call themselves Fapstronaut. Now I am becoming one.
Many Fapstronauts reported big change in their life after they have succeeded at this for days, months, or even years. It seems the longer they stay on the wagon, combined with nourishing activities, the better the results.
My theory is that masturbation and porn OVERstimulate the brain. The activities give the brain too much rewards, without it having to exert energy to perform and focus. It conditions the brain to high level of stimulations. As a result, the brain is no longer able to properly engage in natural activities such as courtship, earning money, sports, and so on.
In the past, people did not have easy access to porn. It took a lot of effort to court and secure a mate. It took the Mongolians a decade or two to conquer both Asia and Europe for the Genghis Khan to bed women of different nations. Today, average man and woman can have free access to porn of multiple, national origins, with just a few clicks.
When you have your desires met so easily, you are not as motivated to engage in old fashioned hard work to actually make things happen in real life.
I am talking about the laying one brick at a time kind of old fashioned hard work.
When our brain is used to focusing on one thing at a time, it feels grounded and calm. The calm energy feels real good. Since I moved out to live on my own, and since I have been doing tutoring job, I slowly feel I have become more focused and grounded. (Blogging like this was way too hard for me. It might have been better for me to start from small such as tutoring.)
We procrastinate because we have trained our brain wrong. We have given it too much unearned rewards, and therefore, the willpower got weak. Now that I understand this, I decided to stop watching movies too. I am not very disciplined yet, but I think gradually slowing down would work.
It took about 30 to 90 days for the brain to basically recover from addictive habits. I intend to replace unhealthy activities with healthier ones, such as stand up comedies. I have been doing stand up comedy these days just so you know my readers.
I am going to report my personal result of NoFap in the months ahead. Not just nofap, but reducing high stimulating activities in general. I have also been practicing meditation to still the mind. It has been 6 months now. In addition to that, I have also been trying to go to gym, and keep on with my N-backing brain exercise.
Interesting, and probably trustworthy resource: http://yourbrainonporn.com/